Emily Sparks -- Spoon River Anthology

<<< Reuben Pantier

This poem was included in the original 1915 edition.

Where is my boy, my boy
In what far part of the world?
The boy I loved best of all in the school?--
I, the teacher, the old maid, the virgin heart,
Who made them all my children.
Did I know my boy aright,
Thinking of him as a spirit aflame,
Active, ever aspiring?
Oh, boy, boy, for whom I prayed and prayed
In many a watchful hour at night,
Do you remember the letter I wrote you
Of the beautiful love of Christ?
And whether you ever took it or not,
My, boy, whereever you are,
Work for your soul'd sake,
That all the clay of you, all of the dross of you,
May yield to the fire of you,
Till the fire is nothing but light!...
Nothing but light!

Comments

Jay Bushman , 8 months ago

Is it just me, or is Emily Sparks's passion for her former student Reuben Pantier, perhaps a little too zealous? The language is all about possessiveness and fire and her virgin heart, with the sense of her earthly passions subsumed in "the beautiful love of Christ." Perhaps she wanted more than she thought she was allowed to have?

Sam V. , 8 months ago

It's not just you. After reading Reuben's Epitaph I am compelled to believe she had more than she was allowed to have... or at least made her aflamed love known to him.

BEP , 8 months ago

Might be good to keep in mind that modes of thought, belief and expression both familiar and authentic among mid-western American men and women of Ms. Sparks's milieu and historical period will differ considerably from our own. We, very few of us, have the gift of religious belief much less dedication to a 'higher cause', belief in transcendence and etc. Emily Sparks, I think, has these gifts, and wishes them not for just this one student but for all those she taught in her lifetime.

Debora , about 1 month ago

I don't think that Reuben was Emily's student; he was her contemporary. She speaks of 'loving him best of all in the school', but even a teacher is a student for part of her life. If you read Reuben's epitaph, you begin to see that he reciprocated her love, and why this love was ill-matched; she was a devout Christian, and he was a libertine. Often children that are friends grow up to find their ideals and ethics have parted ways. She never lost hope of his salvation, although she realized his love was lost to her. It is also obvious by this that she became a teacher (teachers were always unmarried women at this time) because of this ill-matched love, and made her students the children she would never have with him. It is a very sad but common story of that period of time; she loved him, but he could not give up his debauched ways for her.

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Emily Sparks

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